What If Real Pregnancies Were Like Those On TV?

Do you ever watch TV and wonder which of the supposedly pregnant actresses you see are actually expecting?

Having had a child or three, I’m guessing your answer is no. Because now that you’ve been through it, you can spot a faker in a second. They’re the ones with the perfectly round bellies, and not an ounce of bloat anywhere else. And when it comes times to “deliver,” well, they must be having a preemie, because that sweet little bump wouldn’t measure more than six or seven months along. If only that were a true depiction of a full-term pregnancy!

I love seeing actresses rocking real pregnancies on TV. It’s a category of people you rarely see on the screen: actual pregnant women, sometimes even in their final ginormous months!

It was liberating to watch Megan Boone waddle through several episodes of ABC’s “The Blacklist,” to notice that her face was getting a little puffy. Her pregnancy having been written into the script, she was free to look like a woman who was growing a baby, with all the changes to the whole body that entails. Same goes for Melissa Fumero on FOX’s “Brooklyn Nine-Nine.” She even got to wear medical scrubs for what looked like was the last month or so of her pregnancy–hello, that’s every expecting woman’s dream.

The fake bumps drive me crazy. With no padding anywhere else, these bellies-only pregnancies are as harmful to the female body image as Internet trolls. I’m sure there are some lucky women who don’t get cankles, bigger booties, and shirt-popping cleavage during the nine long months of pregnancy. Those are the ladies who post their super-toned pregnancy bodies on Instagram and do postpartum photo shoots in cut-offs and crop tops just weeks after delivering. They are truly disciplined and/or genetically gifted and I can’t fault them for flaunting it.

But for the rest of us, the all-over weight gain and bloating is so common they devote whole pages to it in must-read tomes like What to Expect When You’re Expecting. Women gain weight in all sorts of places during pregnancy–it’s healthy! It’s supporting new life! So to just give a woman a belly and deem her pregnant feels a little underhanded. How about a little padding on the bum? Even a swipe of makeup to suggest the slightest pregnancy-induced double-chin would be appreciated.

Are you bothered by fake bumps on TV?